STAR WARS The Force Awakens


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Joy, uncontrollable shaking joy.

That is what I’ve been feeling since seeing the trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens. If you haven’t seen it yet, then enjoy.

Now For the Honest Breakdown

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“There has been an awakening, have you felt it?”

The establishing shot is likely of Tatooine, a world well explored in the the Star Wars films, and the home to some of greatest heroes and villains in the Galaxy.

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With sudden and violent heralding, our next heroes face arises in worry and terror, while his body is adorned in Stormtrooper armor.

Tucked into the soundtrack we can hear the call of what sounds like an Imperial Probe Droid.

The fact that the first face we see in this trailer is the face of a young black man might be my favorite part of the whole teaser. True representation in pop culture has been lacking for some time, and seeing this new face of Star Wars made my blood sing.

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Enter screen right, some new adorable R-Series/Imperial Probe Droid crossbreed looking thing, rocking some kind of uniwheel-sphere body design.

I’m not crazy about this design right now, but I think it will open into tripod design, so my mind might change.

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Horns flare up up as strobing bulbs bring the upgraded Stormtroopers to eerie light.

I enjoy that the new Trooper design, mostly because it is an update rather than some radical change.

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Their uniforms aren’t the only change as we get a look at the two tone E11 with red highlights, and chrome detailing.

Kinda indifferent to the two tone blasters, since it makes them look a bit toyish, but that might be part of the point, but the red lights are a great touch.

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Down drops the loading doors of some kind of Lamda Shuttle, I’m sure, giving a look at a stormy, mysterious, and foreboding world.

The cross between the boarding of the Tantive IV and the Private Ryan landing on Normandy is pretty tight.

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A hot little update

Thanks to Dubs and Kevin I have notice what might be a a lightspear or maybe a forcepike mounted on the side of Daisy Ridley’s fudgesicle. 

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Then the energizing hum of a speeder cuts in, giving a dramatic close up of our Heroine, a likely native of Tatooine, based on indigenous attire.

Powerful female hero, that’s my Star Wars.

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This isn’t your everyday swoop gang member’s ride, but instead some kind of souped up rig that is looks more likea pod racer’s engine crossed with Luke’s X-34.

Star Wars’ aesthetic of chunky low-high tech is so specific and unique, and this speeder hits it spot on.

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The speeder propels toward the horizon where we see some settlements or moisture farms.

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Cut to the interior of a Starfighter, piloted by a grim faced Rebel who is powering up weapons, and wearing more upgraded, but very familiar duds.

Though it looks like the helmet is a size too small, the gunmetal color and racing stripes ain’t bad at all. Also, just that familiar cockpit shot, come on.

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The starfighter’s exterior is revealed, as a trio of new X-Wings with blue flying colors and interlocking fins fly into frame, skirting just above the rippling surface of a mountainous body of water.

The more angular shape and interlocking wings with half circle engines are a nice touch to the XWing 2.0.

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Cue brooding baritone horns, as a obsidian figure enters a snowy and shadowy moon lit forest. Each one of his steps punctuated by the words “The Dark Side…”

The low angle builds a great overbearing energy to our new SITH villain.

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And with a swift motion of a leather gloved hand, a Sith hilt is drawn, and ignites with a violent serpent like hiss and electric crackle, revealing three crimson lightsaber blades.

After another blackout where no sound is heard but the gravely voice continuing “…and the Light.”


Seeing the fierce ignition of the only lightsaber in the trailer is so satisfying, but I keep going back and forth of the crossbar parts,

I would have been down for a halberd saber.

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Bursting forward in an all too familiar style is the dearly beloved Millennium Falcon


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It’s retrofitted with a new rectangular deflector dish after loss of the previous one Lando’s attack run on the second Death Star during the Battle of Endor.

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We get the Falcon rocket into open blue skies like never before.

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Much of the fancy flying mimics that of from the Battle of Endor,

with dazzling camera work that shows the unconfined YT rolling and juking over the surface of Tatooine.

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Then the familiar sound of blaster cannons and screaming Ion engines enters, as two adversarial TIE Fighters take the Millenium Falcon in a forward attack pass.

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Then close with the classic Star Wars logo.

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Which widens to reveal the subtitle.

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Then the punch to the balls that you have to wait another year to watch this epic boss-ness.

Ouch, my balls.


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  1. More likely a larger/unstable blade and two aesthetically pleasing exhausts. The are flames and look much different, save for the color and glow, than the actual blade.

    But man does it look cool. And the X-Wing lake shot? Delicious.

    • Evan LoadedDice on

      I have been hearing the energy exhaust idea a little bit more and more, you might be onto something.
      Thank for the comment, and May The Force Be With You

  2. I like Colbert’s idea: All three internally are the same laser stream. Therefore, if you cross lightsabers, and the lightsaber slides down the other, it would only cut the metal around the cross guard beam and run into the beam emanating outwardly from the vertex of the cross. The metal would only be there as a safety feature for the user.

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